If you want to, JUST DO IT!

Hello,
My name is Bwings and I want to go vegan!

I've been wrestling with this for a few weeks now...months even. I've been vegetarian now for years. Over the summer I actually did a fair amount of research into some books that happen to be vegan. After learning even more I have wanted to be vegan. I'm scared of so many changes. Mostly of inconveniencing my friends.
But then I also read a book geared towards vegetarians who suffer the wrath of the angry meat eater. We all know the type, the one who tries to sneak meat into your food and then cackles, "HAHA you just ate meat!"

In that book it says, "if it helps, try to think of all meat eaters as blocked vegetarians." What is a blocked vegetarian you may ask? Quite simply put it is a vegetarian that for some reason still eats me. Simple right? It actually describes pretty much everyone. Go ahead, ask yourself, "Why am I not a vegetarian?" Whatever your answer is ... that is why. Simple and it really helps. As odd as that is. When I hear someone ranting about how I am inconveniencing them I can quietly think to myself, "This person isn't a veg because they worry it would be a giant inconvenience to themselves."
When someone tells me I'm just a big baby and to put on my big girl panties I can think, "This person isn't veg because they think it'd make them look weak." Sure it might not be the only reason but at least it takes the "attack" out of the interaction and turns it back on them. It makes it far less personal and more about their own problems with their own diet.

So having rehearsed that I now find myself applying it to myself. The same reasons I hear meat eaters say they aren't vegetarian are why I'm not vegan.
Lines I have used:

1. It will be hard.
2. It will be a giant inconvenience for my friends.
3. David has already been so compassionate and understanding. How can I put him through more family issues. (if they came up)
4. I might alienate those friends who barely understand my vegetarianism. They wouldn't be able to handle this change.
5. I don't know how to replace some of these foods.
6. I can't find the natural foods in my local grocery store.
7. What if I am in a restaurant and they only have food with animal by-products.
8. My sister will hate me, we'll never go out anymore.
9. David has already accepted vegetarian suppers as the norm. Now I'll have to make two meals or offer him shredded cheese to sprinkle on his food. :p 
10. If I go vegan...what's the next step? When will I be satisfied that I am doing enough for my body, my health, the earth and my morals? 
11. Will it put strain on my relationship with David. He may never be full on vegetarian. That already promises to be a dilemma between us some days. What if he ate cheese covered chicken breasts and I lost it? 

When I went vegetarian my boyfriend at the time heard me running some of these problems through my head and his answer was quite quick, easy and honest. Exactly what I needed to hear at the time. And that was: "It's something you've wanted to do for a while. So just do it! To hell with what other people think. This is about you and if it makes you happy then just do it!"

I've already managed to cut eggs out of our house. We have not had eggs in this house in months. I don't put milk on my cereal, I eat oatmeal. But when I do put milk on my cereal I make it Soy milk. I have been trying some cheese substitutes. Homemade ones mind you and they have been fine. I haven't completely removed these aspects outside of the home but they are growing harder for me to eat. For instance, I bite into something in a restaurant now and I question whether I should. My daughter had mac & cheese at our grocery store the other day and I finished it off for her. As I chewed I thought, "I didn't have to eat this." We had K.D. for supper the other night and again I thought, "Completely unnecessary."

I know as far as my family goes I would be happier if these animal by-products came from a small farm that didn't support veal or grinding up baby male chicks. Then it'd just be the question of the carcinogenic factor. Basically I would still consider it unhealthy but at least it would not be as immoral.

So... maybe I should address some of my own questions and concerns.

1. It will be hard.
   Life wasn't meant to be easy. Get over it! 
2. It will be a giant inconvenience for my friends.
   No it won't. I'm always telling them to not worry about it. It is not their job to ensure the restaurant is vegan friendly it's mine. If they are going to a restaurant that will have nothing for me then I will eat beforehand and if appropriate maybe bring something to eat there. They needn't worry if I don't eat with them but just be content to have me present. 
3. David has already been so compassionate and understanding. How can I put him through more family issues. (if they came up)
   Everyone knows I can stand up for myself. If this put a riff between family members I think I could deal with it. Still I do want to be fair to him. :p he knew what he was getting into when we started dating, but back then I was just a gelatin-free-yogurt eating, barefoot, tree hugging vegetarian. Now I will be consuming soy? Oh boy! 
4. I might alienate those friends who barely understand my vegetarianism. They wouldn't be able to handle this change.
   Let's face it, they are already alienated when the topic comes up. Nothing is going to change. It'll just remain among those topics like Politics, Religion, Sexual preference and Diets. 
5. I don't know how to replace some of these foods.
   That's why it won't happen all at once. Going vegetarian was so much easier. It was simple, cut out meat. Find out what foods secretly mean meat and cut them out too. You're always learning. I don't consider myself a failure just because I haven't completely rid my life of animal by-products. It's a process. I'll get there. 
6. I can't find the natural foods in my local grocery store.
   Then find another store! 
7. What if I am in a restaurant and they only have food with animal by-products.
   Then I should have looked into it before I left home. If that wasn't an option then have a dressing free salad. OR if a small exception to a rule must be made for that day... (not meat) then it's my own choices. The world isn't going to collapse, the mob isn't going to come after me because I picked out the eggs in my spinach salad. Just as no one is going to go nuts that I forgot to ask if they mashed pig fat into my potatoes. Sucks in the moment but you make a mental note, "this restaurant isn't vegan/veg friendly." and maybe fire off an e-mail later asking if they ever plan to have meat/animal free products. Simple. 
8. My sister will hate me, we'll never go out anymore.
   My sister will not hate me for this. She might be inconvenienced but she won't hate me. 
9. David has already accepted vegetarian suppers as the norm. Now I'll have to make two meals or offer him shredded cheese to sprinkle on his food. :p
   This actually worked out quite well. We had an almost vegan supper the other day. I simply had him grate some cheese which he sprinkled over his food. His quote was, "I may go vegetarian but I'll never be vegan." Incidentally those were my famous last words 10 years ago! :p look at me now ;) 
10. If I go vegan...what's the next step? When will I be satisfied that I am doing enough for my body, my health, the earth and my morals?
    Honestly...I don't know the next step. I doubt I'll ever be satisfied that I'm doing enough. As I learn the more I want to learn. I will constantly be bringing things under my magnifying glass and determining what I feel about it before I go forward. This isn't a bad thing. It can be a little overwhelming at first though. Knowing that I'm on an endless quest of constant self-improvement but ... it's also everyone's journey for no one is perfect. 
11. Will it put strain on my relationship with David. He may never be full on vegetarian. That already promises to be a dilemma between us some days. What if he ate cheese covered chicken breasts and I lost it?
    Any relationship has their weakness and if ours is to be our differing diets than I'd say we have it pretty lucky. Some days I am quite withstanding of his plates of flesh. Other days I am honestly disturbed and bite my tongue until it hurts. He knows his food can upset me and so we have both agreed I will never again have to cook dead animals for him. If he wants the chest of a chicken on his plate he will have to cook it himself. ;)  Communication is key and we are always talking. When I learn something new he learns it too. We both are on never ending journeys of self-improvement. I just dive full into some things and he into some others. 

This promises to be a long path but I feel I will be vegan before much longer. It only took 9 years to consider it and 5 months to convince me!